Oral Fixation

Hi, I’m Michael Fiore.

This manual (and its accompanying audio material) is a step-by-step guide you can use to “flip a switch” in your woman’s mind and make giving you a blow job one of her favorite things in the world.

To a lot of guys (guys who have been “orally challenged” for years) that might sound impos- sible, but if you go through this material with an open mind and put it into action I think you’ll be shocked at just how well it works.

In this program I’ll teach you the eight big reasons women don’t like to (or won’t) give blow jobs, will show you how to “reframe” blow jobs as something fun and sexy that she enjoys and takes pride in, and will tell you EXACTLY what to do when she DOES give you a blow job to make sure you don’t “scare the rabbit” and ruin your chances of getting head ever again.

One quick note: If you’re a misogynist or someone who “hates women” please delete this manual from your computer and get your refund right away. Personally, I adore women in all their weird, wonderful, curvy, crazy ways and what I teach is 100% based on the idea of understanding women on a deep, primal level, giving them what they secretly crave and ap- proaching sex as something you can both revel in and enjoy.

As I like to say, the best way to get what you want is to give her what she wants (even though she probably doesn’t know she wants it.)

If you have any questions or if something is unclear in the product, please shoot me an email at michael@textyourwifeintobed.com.

That’s my personal email address and I’m the only one who answers it.

A couple quick rules before you write me:

• Make sure to use complete sentences. It’s hard for me to answer your question if I can’t figure out what you’re saying. (I have a lot of international customers. If English is your second or third language, don’t sweat it. Just do your best.)
• Please refrain from using ALL CAPS IN YOUR MESSAGE. It’s annoying and I won’t respond to you if you do.
• Be respectful. Above and beyond everything else, I’m here to help you have a better, more satisfying and “dirtier” sex life. (And to teach you how to make your wife or girlfriend the most satisfied, happiest woman on the block.)One last thing: In a few places in this manual I reference one of my other products, Text Your Wife Into Bed.Text Your Wife Into Bed is a step-by-step guide for using text messages to turn your wife or girlfriend on by “remote control.”

It’s become pretty ridiculously popular since I created it and has helped a lot of guys put the spark back in their relationship and get the dirty, wonderful sex and intimacy they’ve been craving. (Several guys tell me that TYWIB has saved their marriage, which I find pretty damned humbling.)

If you’d like to check out Text Your Wife Into Bed, just go to www.textyourwifeintobed.com.

Enjoy the manual and the audios (one of the audios is just me reading the material in this manual so you can listen in your car or at the gym. The other is an interview on this material I did with my friend Sloane Fox to give you the woman’s perspective on blow jobs, and how to turn your woman into a “Blow Job Lover” in no time flat.

OK, dive in and USE THE MATERIAL. It can’t do a damned thing for you if you don’t use it. Later —

Mike

The 8 Nefarious Reasons Women Don’t Like Giving Head (and What To Do About It) 

NOTE: The reasons below all come from my own personal experience and from conversations I’ve had with women ranging from 25 to 65. Some of the women I talked to are avowed “blow job lovers” while others are women who “just don’t like doing that.”

Study this list and mark off in your mind the reasons that seem to apply to your woman.

{ Reason 1: } She thinks “It’s Degrading To Women.” 

It seems a little old fashioned to me, but a lot of women still think that giving you a blow job is degrading to women.

Due to cultural stereotypes, things they’ve seen in porn or feminist theory, they see fellatio as a way for men to show their domination and power over women.

And you know what? To some degree they’re right.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m not supposed to say that, but on a deep and primal level getting a blow job (or GIVING a blow job) IS about power, connection, service and submission.

It’s about one person doing everything they can to make another person feel good. And done right it can be a hell of a boost to the ego of both people in the equation.

This might sound unbelievable depending on how often you get head, but a lot of women actually LIKE the submissive aspect of giving blow jobs (more than you’d probably think.)

And I don’t know about you, but I definitely DO feel powerful and virile and just plain GOOD when my girlfriend is going down on me.

I mean, there’s a reason we guys LOVE getting blow jobs in the first place and it’s not all physical. There’s a damned good mix of power and fantasy mixed in there as well.

So while I agree that a blow job really can be about power (both your power over her and her power over you) I totally reject the idea that a blow job is “degrading” to women.

When we get to the “step by step” part of this manual I’m going to show you how to “flip the switch” on how your woman thinks about blow jobs so instead of seeing it as something “de- grading” and “humiliating” she sees it as a way of exerting her sexual power over you.

For now, I want you to do two things: 

1. Accept the fact that getting a blow job is about more than just physical pleasure for you. Deep down in your subconscious there’s a part of you that gets off on having a woman “worship” your cock and be completely dedicated to your
pleasure. And you know what? That’s just fine. I’ll tell you right now, if you’re in any way “ashamed” about your desire for a blow job it’s going to be a lot harder to make this work.

So just accept it. You want a hummer. In fact, you want a great, eager, fun, toe curling hummer. It’s cool.

2. Stop thinking of a blow job as something she “does for you” and start thinking of it as something you can SHARE together. We’ll get more into this later, but on a conscious level I need you to start seeing blow jobs as a POSITIVE thing that you and your woman can do together that you BOTH should enjoy.

Reason 2: } She Thinks it’s “Dirty Down There.” 

A lot of women don’t like giving blow jobs because they think guys are dirty, disgusting pigs. And they’ve kind of got a point.

If you haven’t taken a shower in two weeks, are wearing the same underwear you had on during the Bush presidency and think soap is “some kind of commie plot against masculinity”… Well, there ain’t no way you’re getting head.

Listen: In this manual I’m going to teach you EXACTLY how to get your woman to LOOK for- ward to giving you head and ENJOY it as much as you do.

But if you don’t do some “basic maintenance” first the whole thing is going to blow up in your face.

So here’s some basic stuff you need to do:

1. TAKE A FUCKING SHOWER. Seriously, dude. Get in there with REAL soap and clean up the whole area. Spend some time on it and make your whole undercarriage (balls, cock, ass) as spotless as humanly possible. Use some scented soap (something girly) so she can tell you actually cleaned up. (Women have MUCH more sensitive senses of smell than guys do.)
2. Mow the lawn. OK, I’m a big hairy guy (my ethnic background is French, Italian and Lebanese. I get hairier by the minute) so this is actually a sensitive subject for me. But I’m going to tell you right now your chances of getting GREAT head on a REGULAR basis go WAY up when you get in there with some clippers and clear out the underbrush. I mean, how the heck can she suck your cock if she can’t find the damn thing?
3. Be “conspicuously clean” and let her know it. OK, this is subtle but important. Make sure she KNOWS that you’ve cleaned up. Next time you’re planning on getting amorous with your lady (or before you play the “games” I teach you in the next section) do what girls do and “go freshen up.”

Here’s how it works:

• You finish dinner or come home from a date out with the woman.
• You start making out and getting things a little hot and heavy (maybe you used Text Your Wife Into Bed to get her heated up.)
• Look her in the eye and say “I’ll be right back. I just want to go get clean for you.” Go take a shower, use soap, make sure she can hear what you’re doing.She’ll notice. She’ll thank you. She’ll be much more willing to put ALL your body parts in her mouth.

Reason 3: } The Gag Reflex (She Chokes) 

OK guys, good news and bad news. The good news is that most women really can learn to deep throat over time (and it feels great.)

The bad news is that the odds are your wife is NOT Linda Lovelace. Do me a quick favor:

1. Take your index finger . . .
2. Shove it down your throat as far as possible.
3. See what happens (You probably GAG and feel that vomit reflex.)

Was that PLEASANT?
Was that something you LIKED? Of course not.

And unless your woman is an “old pro” at giving head or a genetic freak with no gag reflex, she doesn’t like it either.

Most women I know HATED giving head the first couple times they did it because the guy they were with grabbed her head and made her choke.

And weirdly enough that traumatic event really colored the experience for her and made it something she didn’t want to do again.

In section two I’m going to show you ways to get rid of her “fear of choking, but for now I just want you to really think about what you’re asking her to do. Empathy goes a long way =-)

{ Reason 4: } She Has Bad or Traumatic Memories 

This is actually a big one. A lot of women have bad memories of boyfriends or guys they were dating really making fellatio into a negative experience. Heck, you might be guilty of doing this yourself.

And (no way of avoiding this conversation) a VERY large percentage of the women in our society have either been raped or molested at some point in their lives.

If your woman has gone through something like this (and especially if it involved oral sex, which it often does) you’re going to have a harder road ahead of you. Not impossible, just harder.

No instructions for now, but bad memories are a huge reason so many women don’t like giv- ing head.

I’ve talked a few guys through this situation, so email me directly at michael@textyourwifein- tobed.com if you run into this particular bogeymen.

Reason 5: } She Thinks “Good Girls Don’t Do That” 

This one often comes from a religious or conservative upbringing where she was taught that giving head is a “sin” or something that “good girls” don’t do.

And guys actually make this WORSE by treating a blow job as the “holy grail” of sexuality or trying to PRESSURE her into doing it.

Getting over the “good girl” stigma is actually pretty easy. Just keep reading.

{ Reason 6: } She’s Scared To Swallow/Doesn’t Like The Taste 

I blame porn. A lot of guys have this unrealistic expectation that women should be EAGER to swallow.

In the real world, women that really LIKE doing that are pretty rare (and treasured like the beautiful unicorns they are.)

For now, I want you to take swallowing off the table completely. That’s not what we’re going for yet. Once you get more advanced you can learn some techniques for getting her to want to swallow and maybe even enjoy it. But you’ve got to crawl before you can skateboard.

{ Reason 7: } She Thinks You’re A Hypocrite For Asking (And She Might Be Right.) 

OK, I can’t even tell you how many emails I’ve gotten from women saying “Mike, I give my husband slow, deep, wonderful blow jobs but he REFUSES to go down on me! What do I do!”

Plain and simple, if you want your woman to get into the idea of giving you oral on a regular basis (and really getting INTO it) you’ve got to be willing and EAGER to do the same for her.

Yeah, I know, some guys “hate” doing that, don’t like the smell, think it’s not “manly” or what- ever.

And my advice to you is to GET THE #@$@ OVER IT.

If you want to get, you have to give. And you have to give REALLY well. So next time you and your woman are going at it, kiss your way down her stomach, pray to whatever gods you wor- ship and get to work. It’ll be worth it, I promise.

And last but DEFINITELY not least, the BIGGEST reason so many women don’t like giving blow jobs is…

{Reason 8: } She Doesn’t Think She’s Any Good At It… 

OK, this is actually huge.

When I was doing my research for this training I heard from woman after woman that one of the biggest reasons they didn’t like giving head was because they didn’t think they were any good at it.

Fact is most women have “low blow job self esteem” and are petrified that you’re going to tell them what they’re doing “isn’t as good as your ex girlfriend” or “doesn’t measure up in some way.”

(Tangentially, this low self esteem is a huge part of the “sex problem” I see in so many relationships. The woman doesn’t feel truly sexy, desired or “good” at sex, so she takes it off the table. This some- times happens due to no fault of the guy at all.)

As you’ll see in section 2, a huge part of what I’m going to teach you is built around BUILDING up her sexual self esteem (both around blow jobs and around sex in general.)

In fact, by the time you’re done with this material your woman will feel worlds better about her ability to please you, will actually ENJOY giving you head and will actually have improved her sexual skills by leaps and bounds.

Cool, huh?

OK, now that we’ve laid out the reasons she won’t give you head, we’re going to dive head first into the “super ninja awesome part” of the program and show you EXACTLY what to do to turn your woman into a blow job enthusiast.

Make sure you go through and recap your instructions from this section (especially the stuff around cleanliness and making sure she knows you’ve cleaned yourself up) and then move on to Section 2.

Getting Her To “Go There” In The First Place

OK, even if your wife or girlfriend “sometimes” gives you head now, I still recommend you read (and reread) this section. It’s all in the name of getting great blow jobs, but what I teach you in the next few pages will do wonders for your sexual connection, your woman’s desire to try new things and the amount of FUN you guys have in the bedroom together.

Here’s a couple of basic rules and things you need to internalize in order to make this “blow job” thing start to happen in your life.

1. If you don’t already have a sex life with your wife or girlfriend, or don’t know how to get things heated up, go check out www.textyourwifeintobed.com. It’s a great program. (Granted, I’m biased, but a LOT of guys say it changed their lives.)
2. I’m repeating myself from earlier, but you need to permanently change your thinking around blow jobs. Weirdly enough, if you want to get more head in your life you need to treat blow jobs as “no big deal.” If getting a blow job is the “be all, end all” of your sexual- ity then it becomes too much pressure for her. If it’s “just something fun you guys can do” it’s more likely to happen and happen often.
3. Don’t beg… EVER. I cover this more in TYWIB, but your woman needs to see you as a sexually powerful man. Most women want their man to be the dominant but respectful one in the sexual relationship. That means you CAN NOT BE ASHAMED OF YOUR DESIRES. If you ever act embarrassed by something you want sexually your odds of getting it go WAY down. Whether you want her to go down on you or put on a sexy clown costume and juggle your balls, you need to OWN your desire and feel confident about it. This can be hard to pull off, but it’s incredibly important.
4. Don’t be misogynistic. This whole method is based around loving and respecting women. In my own life I’ve discovered that the more I respect and adore women the dirtier, sexier and weirder things they’ve been willing to do with me. Even if you really want to be dominant with a woman, the best way to get there is to have a sincere desire to give her pleasure and to have FUN with her.
5. Expanding on that, you need to start thinking of blow jobs as “something you guys SHARE” instead of something she does for you. This is a really important distinction. Once you internalize this concept you’ll both start having a lot more fun. It’s got to be fun for both of you.

While you’re making love, use just the very tip of your fingers to gently stroke her lips and mouth. Don’t try to shove your fingers in there (we’ll do that later) just GENTLY touch her lips. Do it as lightly as you humanly can.

Introduce food play into your lovemaking. Strawberries are GREAT for this, by the way. While she’s turned on and you’re doing one of your favorite things to her, bring a strawberry up to her mouth and encourage her to eat it.

2. Creating an “oral fixation.” 

OK, you remember Pavlov’s dogs?

(No, I’m not equating your wife to a dog, but this is going to be the easiest way to explain this concept.)

The short version is that Pavlov rang a dinner bell every time he was going to feed some dogs he had. Before long the dogs started salivating when he rang the bell even when there was no food.

We’re going to start doing something similar with your wife. We’re going to start creating a connection between pleasure and the idea of having part of YOU in her mouth.

How?
Great question.

Next time you’re in bed with your woman, take time to really focus on HER plea- sure. If there’s a particular way she really likes you to fuck her, do that. Or you can go down on her, use your fingers…really, just focus on doing something you KNOW gets her off and that she really enjoys.

While she’s in the throws of passion, bring your fingers up to her mouth. Just bring them right up to her lips. (Quick note: many women really LIKE the taste of their own vaginal juices. You may want to get your fingers all wet, finger her to an or- gasm and then bring your fingers up to her mouth.)

The key is to have her suck on your fingers either WHILE she’s experiencing great pleasure (one hand is getting her off while the other is in her mouth) or directly afterwards (she comes and then you bring your hand to her mouth.)

This is largely a continuation of our last “Trick” but it deserves its own section.

If/when she starts to lick and suck your fingers, make sure you give her POSITIVE reinforcement.

Look her in the eye and tell her: “You look so beautiful right now.” Or “That feels soooo good.”
Or “Wow, you’re good at that.”
Or “God, I love your tongue.”

You can really say anything as long as it’s complimentary, lets her know that what she’s doing looks/feels really sexy and helps to build up her “oral ego.”

We’re really laying groundwork here so she feels good and confident when she finally does go down on you.

If you have Text Your Wife Into Bed, make sure to study the “Waterfall Effect” video that came with the program. The waterfall effect is a method I developed for giving a woman an orgasm just by talking to her (whacky, but it really works and is based off metaphor and the way the female mind works.)

Use the waterfall effect and while you’re talking her through her pleasure, bring your fingers to her mouth. Let her suck and lick as you continue to pleasure her with your voice. This accomplishes much the same thing as trick one, but allows you to get her used to the idea of her having pleasure without you touching any of her obvious erogenous zones but while she’s sucking part of you.

(More advanced techniques can include using hypnotic language to create a really direct channel between her mouth and her erogenous zones. You can actually get it to the point that she comes just by sucking you off. If you want to learn about it, write me at michael@textyourwifeintobed.com)

3. Use “outside the bedroom talk” to reinforce her mouth as sexually desirable 

OK, this part is easy.

Hopefully you’re in the habit of giving your wife/girlfriend/lover compliments (If you’re not, you really should be. This isn’t about you being subservient or anything, it’s about you being a sexually powerful male who appreciates her. Women love that.)

What I want you to do from now on is start mixing in the occasional comment on her lips, mouth or tongue.

So at one point you might comment on her eyes, her hair, whatever else you find sexy about her (I tell my girlfriend how much I love her ass on a regular basis.)

But then slip in something like . . .
“You have the most gorgeous lips.”
Or “Your tongue really turns me on.”
Or “I love the way your lips feel on my skin.”

You don’t ever need to make a direct connection between this and oral sex. Instead just create the idea in her mind of her lips, mouth and tongue being sexy and beautiful and desirable. Again, we’re going for more self esteem, power and desirability here.

With everything you’re doing, make sure you do it with a smile. =-) Remember, sex is FUN!

Trick

three

…

4. “Suck her cock.” 

WHOA!!!!
OK, OK, get off the ledge. Don’t panic. It’s going to be OK.

You don’t ACTUALLY need to suck anyone’s cock here. What you DO need to do is give her a tiny glimpse of what it’s like to receive a blow job.

I know, this sounds weird, let me explain.

Next time you’re messing around with your woman I want you kiss your way down her arm. Use your tongue and lips liberally here and really let her enjoy it.

(You may also want to nibble on her wrists. Little known fact how good that feels to a woman. Depending on what she’s into you can even bite her pretty hard there. That’s been a secret weapon of mine for years.)

Kiss your way across her palm, up her fingers and then (with a smile, this is FUN) take her finger into your mouth. Eye contact is good here. Really have fun with her fingers. Fingers are actually REALLY sensitive. She’ll probably like this a LOT and may even get into it. (I’ve had women say things like “Yeah, suck it” to me. I go along with it because I know good things are coming my way.)

Being the “Receiver” in that way can really help your woman get into the idea of blow jobs be- ing fun for both sides.

(Tangent: Obviously, you should also be up for going down on your woman. It’s really not fair of you to ask her to if you’re not willing to do the same. Man up and get down there.)

(Tangent two: Going down on her doesn’t replace the sucking her fingers thing. There’s some- thing about penetrating someone that is so wholly different from cunnilingus that it might as well be on another planet. If you really want this, really get in there and suck her fingers like they’re a sexual extension of her. Have fun with it. If you show her you can do that without losing your masculinity or dominance she’ll realize she can go there too…and lower.)

WHEW!
OK, now it’s time to get to the REALLY GOOD STUFF…

5. Make it seem like her idea/put her in the drivers seat 

OK, as I said way back in the first few pages of this (increasingly comprehensive…man, my fingers are tired) training, one of the reason so many women don’t like giving blow jobs is be- cause of trauma from the past. A boyfriend or husband or some guy they were dating was too rough with her, made her gag, created a bad memory and ruined it for the rest of us.

So what we need to do to get her to be INTO the idea of giving you head is put her in the driver’s seat and make the whole thing seem like her idea.

If you follow the first 4 steps I listed out here you should be slowly warming her up to the idea of her mouth being an erogenous zone and oral being fun.

Now it’s time to give her the opportunity to “take the bait” and make the decision all on her own to give you head. (Once she makes that decision even just once on her own, she’s yours. As long as you don’t make the experience uncomfortable or unpleasant she’ll want to come back again and again and again.)

Here’s some great news: To accomplish this you get to PLAY SOME GAMES with your wife/ woman/girlfriend/lover/mail carrier.

Sooo… roll around with your woman like you normally do.

(Remember the hygiene rule from before, by the way. Take a shower. Use soap. Make sure she KNOWS you took a shower and used soap.)

Then, when she’s nice and turned on, tell her you want to play a game. Say it with a smile. It’s going to be fun.

(Note that for both of these games I recommend you take penetrative sex off the table. You can play with each other manually or orally but take the idea of “fucking” off the table completely. You’ll have more fun and so will she.)

Game 1:

 Step 1:

“What Do You Want Me To Do To You?”

Set a timer for 5 minutes.

Have her lay on the bed.

Say to her “For the next 5 minutes I will do whatever you want me to to you.”

(Note: Some women will panic at being given control like that. Make some suggestions. “I can mas- sage you. I can touch you all over. I can kiss you all over. I can finger you.”)

When my girlfriend and I play this game she usually asks me to spend time sucking her breasts or focusing on something that I (I’m a horny dude and have a tendency to want to get in there and get to business) don’t usually take the time to do long enough when we’re fuck- ing.

Whatever she asks you to do DO IT. In fact, do it with GUSTO. Let her know you’re ENJOYING giving her pleasure.

The great thing about this game is that it takes all the pressure off of her to perform or to do anything to you. She can just relax and enjoy what you’re doing to her. It creates a great sense of gratitude and reciprocity. (Taking penetrative sex off the table can actually do wonders for your sex life in general, by the way.)

Step 2: SWITCH! 

After the five minute timer is up, ask her if she enjoyed that. Look her in the eyes and kiss her.

Then ask her if she wants to switch places. She’ll probably say yes, but if she doesn’t, just go with it. Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint.

If she does say yes (she probably will) DO NOT jump the gun and ask her to give you head. In fact, don’t ask her to do anything overtly “sexual” at all.
Instead, start pretty innocent. Say something like . . .
“I want you to spend 5 minutes just touching my chest and legs but NOT my cock.”

Or “I want you to kiss all over my body.” (She may kiss your cock during this, but it’s HER idea.)

Or “I want you to kiss and lick and suck my fingers.”

Whatever it is, make it something SENSUAL instead of sexual. Bringing her mouth into things is a GOOD idea at this point, but you need to make sure you’re not rushing to oral sex.

(QUICK NOTE: When I was single I had one little “trick” I would use on a date that would pretty much guarantee I would get laid every time.

What was it?

If things were getting hot and flirty with a girl and we were anywhere near my apartment I’d wait until we were finishing at the restaurant or bar. Invariably she’d ask what we were going to do next. I would say “Well, you can come over and watch a movie or something but I’m NOT going to fuck you.”

She’d come over, we’d put a movie on (Movie = pretense) and 5 minutes later she’d be giving me head and we’d be on our way to having sex.

By telling her we were NOT going to have sex it let her justify going over to my place even though she knew we WERE going to have sex.

It also removed the expectation of sex which, weirdly, let her give herself permission to have sex. We’re doing something similar here.

By saying “touch me all over but NOT my cock” or “kiss me all over but NOT my cock” you remove the EXPECTATION of her stroking you or sucking you, and by doing so you actually increase her DESIRE to do so.

It’s like telling a little kid NOT TO JUMP ON THE BED.

It just makes them want to more.

By telling her NOT to touch her cock (do it with a smile, not a bark. She needs to know she won’t be punished if she does) you free her up to make the DECISION to touch your cock or give you blow job on her own. Expectations suck. Remove them and great things happen.

OK, that note wasn’t quick at all, but it was really important.)

Game 2: 

Reverse the rules.

Game two is essentially the same thing with reversed rules.

Have her lay down on the bed. Say, “OK, now I’m going to spend 5 minutes doing whatever I want to do to you.”

It’s important not to act predatory or weird here. If you have some fetish she’s NOT into, this isn’t the time to bring it up. This isn’t a dom/slave thing or anything like that.

Instead pick something you really DO want to do to her for 5 minutes, tell her what it is and stick to it.

The first time you do this you probably want to keep it pretty basic. Touch her all over. Give her a massage. Feed her your fingers. Massage her ass. (Ass massages turn women into jello, by the way.)

WORSHIP HER BODY. Make her feel like the sexiest woman in the world. Show her how much you adore her and even TELL her how much you adore her while you’re doing it.

f she gives you signals that she really wants you to touch her pussy while you’re doing this, go ahead and do it. But make sure it’s her idea.

NOTE: SHE GETS VETO POWER. If she stops you from doing something RESPECT HER.

After you’ve worked on her for 5 minutes (the timer is important) reverse things again.

Lay down and say, OK, now you get to do whatever you want to me for five minutes.

Ask her what she wants to do and let her TAKE CHARGE and be in control.

Your only job is to LAY there. Keep your damn hands at your side. Only move if she tells you to move. She’s in charge and you’re there for her to do what she pleases to.

From experience I can tell you that if you’ve seeded the idea of blow jobs being a positive thing in her mind she may well take the initiative here.

If she does, CONGRATS! But stick to the 5 minute timer for now. The rules of these games are important.

A couple quick notes:

• If it doesn’t happen the first time CHILL OUT. Depending on how she feels about blow jobs it might take a while to get past the bad programming.
• If she DOES go there, remember it’s wonderful, but “no big deal.” It’s just something fun for the two of you to do together. It’s as much about her fun and enjoyment as it is yours.Follow these steps and she WILL get more adventurous and powerful in bed in general and WILL eventually want to give you head. It might take a few times, but she WILL eventually do it. But again, remember, our goal here is to make it HER idea. It’s something SHE wants to do.You can let her know you’d LIKE IT if she did that, but you should never beg and never insist or make her feel bad for not doing so. Whining is never attractive (rule of life. Whiners and complainers and victims suck.)And if you do ask her and she says no, just keep rolling. It’s no big deal. There will be other times.Oh yeah…

  By the way, even if she doesn’t give you a blow job, playing this game will do WONDERS for your sex life. In fact, you’ll probably have some of the best sex of your relationship by doing this and will see a lot of bullshit in your relationship fall away.

  Seriously. It’s awesome. And really easy to do.
  Stick to the 5 concepts I introduced in this section and she WILL give you a blow job. Now in the next section I’ll teach you the right way to receive a blow job.
  Ready? Keep on trucking.

Step Two: 

Making “giving head” her favorite new hobby

OK, this is actually the really important part.

As you probably know, most women’s egos are fragile, fragile things. And like we talked about before, most women have very little confidence in their ability to give “great head.”

So when she finally DOES start to go down on you it’s REALLY IMPORTANT that you follow these steps to make her feel GOOD about the experience and make it something she’ll want to do again in the future.

Odds are if she doesn’t “like” giving head now she probably won’t be “great” at it when she gets down there.

AND THAT’S OK.

If you follow these steps she won’t just start ENJOYING giving you head, she’ll get a lot BET- TER at it to. (Heck, she might even start seeing it as a challenge to become GREAT at giving you head and making your toes curl.)

READ THIS PART CAREFULLY. After all the hard work we did to get her to go down on you, the last thing we want to do is spook her off it or make it a traumatic event.

A lot of guys fuck this up, which is kind of like playing Metallica right after you finally got the baby to go to sleep. Just plain dumb.

What To Do (and What Not To Do) While She’s Giving You Head

1. DO NOT grab the back of her head or shove your cock way back in her throat. 

Yes, I know this one should be obvious, but it’s amazing to me how many guys try to turn their women into Linda Lovelace on day one.

Remember how you DIDN’T LIKE shoving your finger down your throat? Yeah, well your cock is probably bigger than your finger.

Remember, we’re trying to make giving head a pleasurable and FUN and POWERFUL experi- ence for her.

Especially the first few times, you’ve got to make sure she feels like she’s in charge and can start or stop the process whenever she wants.

At least at first I recommend you keep your hands out of the equation entirely. Don’t touch her head. Don’t grab her. (Actually, grabbing her shoulder in a “that feels so good” way can be fine.)

Down the line she might discover she likes it when you grab her head and when you treat her a little roughly, but for now you gotta keep things basic.

2. DO make EYE CONTACT with her. 

Remember that whole “women don’t like fellatio because it’s degrading/dehumanizing?” Yeah, we’re nipping that one in the bud.

While she’s giving you head LOOK AT HER. Look her right in the eye and smile with pleasure and appreciation.

By making eye contact you establish a real connection between you while she’s blowing you and make it much more something you’re SHARING than something she’s doing TO you.

If you’re in a love relationship, just look her right in the eye while she’s sucking your cock and say “God, I fucking love you.”

3. DO give her FEEDBACK/gratitude and appreciation. 

OK, guys, if you lie there like a dead fish your chances of getting ANOTHER blow job are pretty much nil.

As my friend Susan (who I consulted with while I was writing this) said…

“Women are nurturers. We’ll do anything for that gratitude and appreciation. Where guys screw it up is by making it too much about them. Even if you’re the one getting the PHYSICAL pleasure you’ve got to make the woman feel good about herself.”

Read that a couple times because it’s packed full of wisdom most guys will NEVER under- stand.

While she’s giving you head you’ve got to let her know how GOOD it feels, how much you AP- PRECIATE what she’s doing and how INCREDIBLY SEXY she is…

You do that in two basic ways …

Physical and “unconscious vocal” feedback.

You’ll probably do this unconsciously anyway, but it’s good to be aware of. When she does something to you let yourself react. Let your hips thrust slightly (If you go too hard you’ll make her gag. Just let your hips roll slightly towards her mouth.

By “unconscious vocal” feedback I mean the little moans and groans and gasps we uncon- sciously do when we’re enjoying something.

So let yourself sigh and shiver and basically RESPOND to what she’s doing. As a guy, you probably really enjoy making your woman feel good. You like it when she comes. Women are the same way. They want to know they’re GOOD at something.

Conscious vocal feedback.

OK, that’s really just a fancy way of saying “tell her it feels good.”

(Quick note here: If what she’s doing DOESN’T feel good, don’t LIE to her. But also don’t make it a big deal. We’ll cover how to give her “constructive criticism” a little later on.)

In the meantime, make sure you focus on what she’s doing that you DO like. “Your tongue feels so good.”
“That feels amazing.”

“You are sooooooooo good at that.”

“God, I fucking love you.”

I also recommend you throw in other vocal feedback like…

(While looking her right in the eye while she’s got your cock in her mouth:) “You are so fucking beautiful.”

(Right after she does something that sends a shiver down your spine:) “Oh my god, I love you.”

Whatever you say to her you need to . . .

• Say it with a smile while looking at her.
• Be complimentary.
• Be appreciative.
• Boost her sexual ego and let her know she’s a sex goddess.
• Make eye contact and keep a connection.

4. DO show her technique, give constructive criticism and help her get better at giving you pleasure

OK, once you finally get the blow job you’ve been dreaming of for who knows how long you might be afraid to criticize her technique at all.

But I’m going to tell you right now that just staying quiet or ONLY giving positive feedback is a bad idea.

Here’s why:

• Women are more observant than men and they can tell when we’re faking something.
• If you don’t tell her something doesn’t feel good, she might assume it DOES feel good and keep doing it. Do you really want her to think you like it when she BITES DOWN on your cock when you really want the opposite?So how do you “guide” your woman without her taking offense?Simple, you do it with the time tested and proven “Criticism sandwich.”
  Step 1: Compliment her on something she did that you really like. “Oh, baby, your tongue onmy cock feels soooo good.”Step 2: Gently push her away from whatever she’s doing “wrong” (wrong is subjective. It’s just something you don’t like as much as you like something else) and towards what you want “OK, just loosen your lips a little bit and . . .”

  Step 3: Give her HUGE positive reinforcement when she switches over to what you really want you to do. “OH, fuck, that feels soooo good. Thank you. You’re amazing.”

  Get it?

  Just as a quick example, a couple years back I was dating a girl who had this tendency to grip my cock like it was a snake she was trying to strangle.

  I mean she grabbed it HARD.

Most likely she did this because and ex boyfriend of hers really like it that way, but to me it was just too hard and too much. It made it really hard for me to enjoy what she was doing.

The wrong way to handle this situation would have been to say “Dear fucking god stop trying to crush my penis!!”

Instead I used the criticism sandwich.
While she was pumping my cock and licking the head I said . . .

“Fuck, your tongue feels so good. Now just loosen up your hand a little bit. A little bit more. I really like it when you hold it just lightly and . . . OH that feels so good.”

And from then on she knew that I liked a looser grip than that other guy (who’s cock must have been made of some kind of sponge material to survive the treatment.)

Got it? Good.
Now let’s talk a little bit about . . .

Technique…

It’s weird but a lot of women seem to think they should just be “born” being great at giving blow jobs.

Or they think that if they give one once and don’t enjoy the experience they should never do it again.

Above and beyond the “Criticism sandwich” I talked about above, you should also show your woman what you really like.

How? There are two basic ways . . .

• Show her what you want. This is really simple. If you’d rather she move her hands and mouth slower, just bring your hand down there, LIGHTLY touch her hand and guide her to the rhythm you really want. (WARNING: DO NOT GRAB HER HEAD UNLESS YOU KNOW SHE’S COOL WITH THAT.)
• Tell her what you want in a POSITIVE way.
  Again, just use positive and praising language to guide her towards what you really want. “Itwould feel sooo good it you would get my cock really wet.”
  “Oh, god, that feels great. Can you just hold me in your mouth for a second.”As long as you do it with a smile and a positive intention you can pretty much ask her to do anything and she won’t take offense.5. DO NOT Come In Her Mouth (Unless She Wants You To)OK, I’m a guy and I know as well as you do that coming in a woman’s mouth is one of the greatest physical and mental pleasures we get.

  But the idea of doing it really turns a lot of women off. (Some love it. And those women are like angels sent here from heaven.)

  If you want your woman to really ENJOY giving you head and be EAGER to do it, you need to take the “Coming in her mouth” thing off the table at first.